As I slogged through the rain yesterday (not quite running nor jogging), Madi and Kenan were on my mind. They have swan-dived into their own adventuresome lives and they shine. 

Sometimes, I worry.

Are they safe? Are they doing their best to live their own lives fully? Do they sense God's presence in the moment?

I have friends flying all over the globe, friends in distress, family traveling, and life - like everyone else. Prayers sought from the refugee camps in Kenya, the sex-trafficked streets of east Asia, my friend in the next cubbie, and people I met along the trail.

A slow run in the rain seemed like a great time to chat up the Almighty about all of these lives.

At one point, I prayed "(huff huff) God, I abandon my kids to you - completely. (wheeze) They are yours. And I toss in this life completely to your care (pant - wheeze).

Immediately the thought came to mind: 

"What do you mean by abandoning them to me?

Do you expect a cosmic babysitter to keep them safe and on a short leash? Is that the best for them? Or a social worker to provide resources or Auntie Mame to keep them entertained?"

Gulp. (wheeze)

Because the truth is, yes, yes, and yes. 

I've been asking God to keep them safe and resourced up and entertained...and saturated in his presence...

In that soggy moment of clarity, I had to choose; what do I really want for Madi, Kenan, and the people I love?  

Insulation or God's best?  

Do I claim to trust God with these people and then pray that they live like the boy in the bubble - protected and yet unable to fully experience the adventure life?

God is so gracious. He wasn't scathing or critical or condescending. It seemed that the voice in my heart was just seeking clarification with a most loving gentleness.

So then I prayed this thing:

"Lord, I abandon them all to you. Please be yourself to them, in them, and through them...through all of us. Amen."

And then a peace descended (even as I wheezed up a hill) and an excitement replaced my anxious angsty heart. For a second, I seemed to remember more of who God is than the SuperNanny I'd made him out to be.

He is Just

kind

forgiving

sacrificing

always present

always moving in love with love as the point

mysterious

Universally immense and infinitesimally able to live in my heart

a warrior

King

And though you may hear a Christmastide soundtrack when you read Isaiah 9:6 & 7, he's also described as:

6For to us a child is born,

to us a son is given,

and the government will be on his shoulders.

And he will be called

Wonderful Counselor,^b Mighty God,

Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

7Of the increase of his government and peace

there will be no end.

He will reign on David’s throne

and over his kingdom,

establishing and upholding it

with justice and righteousness

from that time on and forever.

The zeal of the Lord Almighty

will accomplish this.

And this trumps a SuperNanny in my kids' lives, friends' lives, strangers' and my life - any day.