Stunned.

Quiet.

Speechless.

Weeping.

Where are you, God?

Oh-I see. Operating in the best of human agency

people running

grieving fathers in cowboy hats

rescue rushing to the undeclared battle

Hate

wells up to jog me out of a shocked stupor

fight or flight

I let it simmer in me.

And poured it onto my friends

an offer to manually liberate a coward's tiny testicles

grim humor 

from a twice broken heart

Hate only destroys

separates

Love multiplies

redeems

receives

reconciles

Love covers a multitude of my sins, too.

So what to do with the hate and the anger?

Call it what it is

Own up to it

Call out for help

talk it out

run it out

pray it through

know it will swing around and revisit you again

do not let hate isolate you

it will kill you

your world will become too small

and your only response

will be to return hate

with bitter

anger 

and violence.

"Do not let the bastards keep you down."

Don't allow hate to win the day.

Remember the exhausted runners

volunteers

national guard men and women

firefighters and police officers

the spectators

family

who ran to the battle.

Kindness certainly does outrun

outweigh

outnumber

hate.

If it's hard to not hate

ask for help

Nothing is wasted

in God's economy.

He is neither republican nor democrat

pro-life or pro-choice

runner or couch potato

rich or poor

He is not sleeping.

We are not alone in this world.