You probably know many single parents.
I do and I was one…am one. And it is a tough and lonely run through an unknown land at times, but the kids are worth the effort.
I have a friend who has learned to braid his little girls' hair, listen to KidsBop, drink "tea" from tiny cups, and carve time out of his schedule to be in the classroom as needed. He is a police officer and his commitment – whether single dad or not – raises the bar!
We single mums have learned how to talk to our growing guys about all sorts of things, watch movies like "GI JOE: The Rise of Cobra" and have used the content of "SuperBad" to our advantage ("sure you can watch it, but with me! that will be so exciting- here's popcorn"- The movie lasted only 20 long minutes that night!)
Just because you can no longer carry them on your hip and they're off saving the world, doesn't mean we're not still parents. And their growing adds challenge to what is already an adventure race. Dads that talk to their girls about…developing and all of the accouterments that involve a trip to the store and moms that learn how to tie a Windsor knot for their son's first homecoming or prom date attire do so out of necessity and love. Our kids- just like us – need to know that somebody cares enough to do the hard and uncomfortable stuff.
That one – the Windsor knot – nearly killed me; and I'm still iffy about it. So here's to all the "single ladies" who are raising men…who will one day raise the bar; a tutorial on tying a tie (clip-ons are only good in extreme emergencies…)
So if your little one no longer "fits" on your hip for a carry, carry – on with your imagination, creativity, and honesty. They still need you to be mom or dad (never both!)
And you – we – still need to ask our community for help to tie a Windsor, take our son out for a skate around the ice or our daughter for a trip to the coffee shop for a chat with someone who is safe and not "mom".
Thank you to all of the folks who step in to lend a hand. You are saints in jeans and K-State sweatshirts.
Amen, Allie! The memory of having to show my son how to tie a tie is still fresh, and he’s 24 years old! It was during a time when i was so angry about having to talk to him about things that his father should be, but wouldn’t have even if he was around. I went to JC Penneys hoping a clerk would show me how, a few weeks before the 8th grade dance. Instead, they gave me a wonderful booklet i could take home that gave step by step directions. I spent hours in the bathroom with a tie around my neck trying to figure it out. I finally melted down and cried because i couldn’t get it. Yelled at God, cried some more – you know the scene. So, I presented my son with the booklet and his new tie. He took it in the bathroom and followed each step and it turned out almost perfect on his first try! I realized (again) how much God cared for my son…and me.
Martha…I love & appreciate your take on this…that God cared for your kids and you and showed you through this difficult thing.
Joy. I’m amazed how God chooses to redeem so much in the “little” things.
Such a great word…from one who isn’t even a mom. Love this! Appreciate you more than I can say.